In 2006 we had a dream of "saving" a little girl with Down syndrome from Ukraine, as our adoption journey moved forward, to say we were saving someone seemed presumptuous and offensive to the people doing their best to make sure she had nutritious food, a warm bed, and all the love they could give her in that setting.
However, she was saved; she was saved from a future none of us would ever consider for our children; a mental institution, a place they send children like Kara after their 4th birthday. There are mental institutions all over Ukraine, left over from the Soviet Union era, perhaps not where the people of Ukraine would choose to send their children with disabilities, but the place most go nonetheless.
Some have caring directors, usually men, who do the best they can to make the children comfortable and happy. Sadly, some are unspeakably horrible and I will not discuss them here, I have seen pictures, my heart will not heal from the wound inflicted from the dreadful images. I pray for these children daily. I pray that the conditions will change when the people in Ukraine, good people, caring people, will no longer allow it.
I am grateful that we found Kara, despite the circumstances (losing our referral); we know it was providence. No one in our circle of contacts knew about her; at least we do not think they did. No one came back from adopting from her orphanage and advocated for her. I can still hear Alex saying “We will find you child, healthy girl, age 3-5” and he did, he and the SDA did, and in one day, PTL! I no longer matters that we had to sit in the car all day waiting, he and Anatoly found our daughter.
I am grateful Kara begins school tomorrow; Kara would never attend school in Ukraine, she could not attend by country law because they consider he imbecilic (their terms, not mine), and she would have lived out her days in the mental institution. I am so very grateful that she can receive an education.
I am grateful that instead of her 4th birthday being a day of sadness for the caregivers who truly cared for Kara in Ukraine; it will be a day of celebration for them and us, her new family. I am hopeful I can find a translator so I can send the orphanage a letter and pictures of Kara going to school and celebrating her birthday. (Please if someone knows a person who can help, let me know)
I am grateful Kara’s family had the courage to release her for international adoption, even though Kara lived in an orphanage; her grandmother still visited her. She actually came a few times and observed us playing with Kara, we did not know whom she was, but she fell into the caregiver’s arms and sobbed when she saw us sitting with Kara, it made me uneasy because I knew it was about Kara. I went back to the room and prayed that night. I did not believe she would prevent our adoption for even though her grandmother loved her, she would never remove her from the system and take her home; we knew that, she knew that. I pray she knows how much we love her granddaughter; we want what is best for her too.
So as Kara approaches her 4th birthday, enters pre-school, which is especially designed for kids who need extra help learning, as she grows (and grows) I say thank you to Ukraine for allowing us to adopt our beautiful little girl, and thank you to her family, to God, for allowing it as well.
(No new pictures, my camera is broken, and I have to save for a new one, I am having withdrawals)
However, she was saved; she was saved from a future none of us would ever consider for our children; a mental institution, a place they send children like Kara after their 4th birthday. There are mental institutions all over Ukraine, left over from the Soviet Union era, perhaps not where the people of Ukraine would choose to send their children with disabilities, but the place most go nonetheless.
Some have caring directors, usually men, who do the best they can to make the children comfortable and happy. Sadly, some are unspeakably horrible and I will not discuss them here, I have seen pictures, my heart will not heal from the wound inflicted from the dreadful images. I pray for these children daily. I pray that the conditions will change when the people in Ukraine, good people, caring people, will no longer allow it.
I am grateful that we found Kara, despite the circumstances (losing our referral); we know it was providence. No one in our circle of contacts knew about her; at least we do not think they did. No one came back from adopting from her orphanage and advocated for her. I can still hear Alex saying “We will find you child, healthy girl, age 3-5” and he did, he and the SDA did, and in one day, PTL! I no longer matters that we had to sit in the car all day waiting, he and Anatoly found our daughter.
I am grateful Kara begins school tomorrow; Kara would never attend school in Ukraine, she could not attend by country law because they consider he imbecilic (their terms, not mine), and she would have lived out her days in the mental institution. I am so very grateful that she can receive an education.
I am grateful that instead of her 4th birthday being a day of sadness for the caregivers who truly cared for Kara in Ukraine; it will be a day of celebration for them and us, her new family. I am hopeful I can find a translator so I can send the orphanage a letter and pictures of Kara going to school and celebrating her birthday. (Please if someone knows a person who can help, let me know)
I am grateful Kara’s family had the courage to release her for international adoption, even though Kara lived in an orphanage; her grandmother still visited her. She actually came a few times and observed us playing with Kara, we did not know whom she was, but she fell into the caregiver’s arms and sobbed when she saw us sitting with Kara, it made me uneasy because I knew it was about Kara. I went back to the room and prayed that night. I did not believe she would prevent our adoption for even though her grandmother loved her, she would never remove her from the system and take her home; we knew that, she knew that. I pray she knows how much we love her granddaughter; we want what is best for her too.
So as Kara approaches her 4th birthday, enters pre-school, which is especially designed for kids who need extra help learning, as she grows (and grows) I say thank you to Ukraine for allowing us to adopt our beautiful little girl, and thank you to her family, to God, for allowing it as well.
(No new pictures, my camera is broken, and I have to save for a new one, I am having withdrawals)
